There were humans (and there are still are) that spent their entire life diving into the inner-most portals of the mind, emotion, body and ultimately, spirit. Like deep-sea divers they searched downwards into dark waters of consciousness, fishing out patterns, revelations, endogenous bliss chemicals and inner doorways into God. And they didn’t make New Year’s Resolutions.
Why? For the yogis, life itself was a continual new resolve. Every breath a potential to enter the portal of either heaven or hell, without all the accoutrement of champagne and the devolved American empty-ritual that is televised ball-dropping and drunken revelry.
Do I sound like a party-pooper, intent on stealing all the glitter off your special day? Well, too bad. Because I love us all too much to keep this secret inside any longer. New Year’s is bullshit. Its not even in tune with Mama Nature – who would much rather us bask in her seasonal shift on the Winter Solstice than January first. Secondly, ain’t nobody gonna’ get their dreams coming true when they remain in the same physical, emotional and mental patterning of last year. Running around doing more is not going to get your dreams coming true, so matter how many affirming sticky-notes you apply to your bathroom mirror.
Okay, so no more sad face. Let’s get into the real juice. We are all on this planet to struggle less and taste more true fulfillment. The Tantrics called us humans kama yonis – which can be translated as “desire creators.” We are meant to long, to reach, to strive, to push out of limitations, to burst into the light of truth and to identify less with our suffering.
Studies show that 95% of New Year’s resolutions fall flat. And it isn’t because people are lazy mother-f#$@(@# eating donuts and bailing on their gym memberships. It’s because about 80% of our behaviors come from the deep, murky realm of our unconscious mind. Think of the unconscious as a dark cavern filled with your oldest childhood patterns (as well as all your hidden potentials for greatness).
This means that there may be voices, stories and behavioral patterns held in this realm that kind of want to sabotage you. On the surface, you do want to feel healthy, find the love of your life, quit your cubicle job or start painting again. But these resolves will fall flat if you don’t go into the source that may be blocking their fruition (without you knowing it). Its crazy how much we don’t know about what we don’t know!
This “non-knowing” becoming known was what the yogi deep-sea divers found when they went into the darkness of the mind. The good news is that when we make these unconscious motivators conscious, we instantly begin to liberate the stuck energy that has wrapped itself around our heart’s deepest longings. And then, guess what? New Year’s Resolutions start working. Even if it’s March 3rd.
Finally, real fulfillment has nothing to do with finding the perfect dream lover, scoring your ideal job or losing 10 pounds. In the words of my teacher, “Fulfillment is constantly and permanently available, provided you know how to access silence. Only by the stilled mind can he (silence) be known, says the Shvetashvatara Upanishad; or as Psalms 46:10 of the Bible tells us, “Be still and know that I am God.”
It is truly simple, but not easy. In fact, we will come closer to achieving our desires this year if we explore our darkness, perhaps, even more than our light. Here are some ways to begin to access the unconscious, so as to taste silence, and manifest destiny:
- Meditate – spend some time every day watching how f’ing crazy you are. Follow your breath. Don’t try to force silence. Simply relax into the fabric of each and every breath.
- Work with your emotions – do not lean into the tendency of either emotional repression or emotional indulgence. When feelings arise in your life, deeply feel them. Acknowledge them. But don’t wet-nurse them or even identify with them.
- Get some therapy. If you’ve never been – you probably should. Its good to have a wise sounding board to help you organize the flora and fauna of your mind. A good therapist can really help you see how some of your beliefs may be saboteurs of your dreams.
- Do yoga nidra. Google it. Free versions abound on Youtube. This is the number one way to liberate yourself from tension and unconscious bullshit. It is also the number one way to relax yourself into your dreams coming true. Yes, your heard right.Relax into getting what you want.
- Get my book. I talk a lot about how to move into loving conscious-mind in my new book, Healthy, Happy, Sexy. Also, my teacher systemically breaks this down in his epic manifestation-manual, The Four Desires.
My deepest wish this year, is that we would all explore the inner caves of our own hearts – that we would shift culture in such a way that we make room for rest, relaxation and feeling our feelings. I hope this New Year brings you closer to one of the best definitions of being a true yogi – “He who has made the unconscious conscious.” And when you do that, you can instantly have most anything your heart desires. But by that point all you will want is this moment. This. Precious. Moment.
In Love,
Katie